"Where may I eat the Passover with my disciples." (vs.14)

My mother grew up in a small village in the French speaking part of southern Belgium. Her father, a rough, hardworking but quiet man, made his living in the back breaking business of coal mining. Black lung from over exposure to coal dust is what finally took his life in 1972.

My mother has related the following story to us. Her grandfather, when her father was younger, wanted more than anything for his son to enter the ministry. This desire however was not rooted in any spiritual ambition but in the fact that at that time the ministry paid well. It was a good life, secure without the uncertainty that characterized many occupations at that time. Lacking such a call my grandfather chose instead to serve Jesus under the much harsher conditions of the coal mines.

My grandfather wisely understood that ministry was far more than a career option but a life call that involved both the privilege of service and the responsibility to suffer for the name of Christ.

No disciple of Jesus should ever think that the privilege of service will not come without this responsibility of identifying with the suffering of Jesus. If you want intimacy with Jesus and to desire to sit at the table to fellowship with him, you must understand the call to share in the fellowship of his suffering. This reality is I believe at the heart of the Lord's Supper.

The Passover would involve Jesus and the twelve - those who had walked most closely with him and knew him best. They were his friends. Luke in his record of this occasion explains how Jesus longed deeply to have this meal with them. "I am eager to eat this Passover with you before I suffer." (Luke 22:15) Through fellowship Jesus planned on preparing his disciples to suffer with him. Rich with symbolism, this meal would fulfill the Passover of Exodus 12. Jesus invites his friends to this intimate event of preparation for the slaughter of the lamb. It was a rare and exclusive privilege to share his burden and passion of being the burnt offering that once for all would satisfy God. (The word Passion is the root word for the words Passover and suffer. Whenever we speak of the passion of Christ we are speaking of his suffering.) This then was no ordinary meal. The disciples joined in what would turn out to be the most intimate moment with their Lord. Intimate, not just because they sat and ate with the creator himself, but intimate because they were being invited to share in the most agonizing event in the life of Christ. David prophetically referred to this as the "table set before my enemies." (Psalm 23:5) Paul called it "the fellowship of sharing in his suffering becoming like him in his death." (Phil. 3:10)

There was something heavy on Christ's heart though, that must have made this less intimate then it could have been. None of his disciples were willing to completely share in his passion. The meal contained the heavy atmosphere of inevitable desertion. To the dismay of his disciples, Jesus also increases the heaviness of this mood by suggesting that one of them would betray him. Then adding further confusion as they left for a garden praying meeting, he announces that all of them would desert him. By deserting him, their unwillingness to follow to death would be exposed. They were really not yet ready to share completely in the fellowship of his suffering. Peter resisted this with every ounce of his being. Even if everyone else left he would face death to protect Christ if it came down to that. Yet the sound of his denial of Christ would carry louder than all the rest and would ultimately turn him into a broken man.

Jesus' invitation to share his passion was poignantly symbolized in the ritual of the Passover meal. Eating the bread and drinking the cup would be to the disciples a visual aid symbolising their identification with his work of redemption. When we celebrate communion today that invitation is extended to us. We join that exclusive group of disciples who were asked to share the passion of our Lord Jesus. Yet how many of us like Paul can say "yes I am willing to share fully in the fellowship of sharing in his suffering"? Most Christians want to share fellowship with him in comfort through praise and joy - but not in suffering.

When we suffer we find we are being invited to join Jesus in his suffering. Right there in our darkest moment the deepest fellowship can occur with God himself. Imagine that! It is often only in our suffering that a friendship with God can mean the most. Peter failed miserably, but later in John 21:15 over a fish breakfast that intimacy is extended again and this time he is ready for it. When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, 'Simon... Do you truly love me more than these?'" Simon does and later he willingly gives his life as an act of love for his Lord. "To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps." (1 Peter 2:21)

I can look back at my darkest periods and realize that these were the times when the Lord was holding me closest. But I couldn't see his face because my face was in his breast—crying.

John Michael Talbot

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